♥ Thursday, December 30
today, i saw somethinq on facebook `
kinda pissed off `
i'm really, really tired `
i havent had any decent sleep since my last holiday `
& this holiday i've not been home for th entire 2 weeks `
mum reckons my home times doesnt even exceed 12 hours `
just speakinq about th past 2 weeks `
-siqhs- `
sometimes i wonder why i do all these nonsense `
i could be sleepinq riqht now `
you don't let me rest `
think about this `
whats th fuckinq point `
biqbro's sleepinq `
so's matthew `
& lil brother's qoinq home from work `
damien's workinq `
-.- other than you `
who th fuck is free `
& you think it's fair ? `
you come to my house to accompany me `
& you wake me up `
& worse `
i told you before `
i hate it when you use my wifi `
just so you can talk to other women `
you know how motherfuckinq fucked up i qet `
hi ;) use your own wifi to talk to women `
it's disqustinq okay `
i Hate it `
& i'm so not qonna reply your status `
whats th point `
every sinqle time i post somethinq upsettinq `
have you ever cared or replied ? `
no, you have not `
so why should i ? `
qo on, tell th world what a horrible qirlfriend i am `
i know anyway thats what you think about me `
you'd never understand how fuckinq hurt i feel `
so what if you hurt me `
lauqhs, i cant hurt you `
you'd never feel it `
i really hate my life `
some people ask why i choose to stay `
i don't know either `
i just do `
-siqhs- `
hate myself , & i'm startinq to hate you `
flirt , fucker & clubber `
i hate you `
Labels: some motherfuckinq post i saw on facebook `
♥ Wednesday, December 29
mummy brouqht me shoppinq today `
i haven been that happy since th end of O levels `
hmmms , just been talkinq to mum about life `
she's my bestest friend ever who understands me inside out `
-siqhs- ` i'm really tired but i neqlected mum th past 2weeks `
so yeah `
went out w th quys `
not that i wanted to `
but it's probably th best way to keep boyf outta th reach of sluts `
dumbfuck but yeah `
so we went to katonq to play pool after supper `
which was rather dumb since it's so fuckinq ulu and all `
but yeah, memories of Eric honeh `
honeh i miss you , better start readinq my bloq aqain `
& start findinq me for pool sessions & traininqs ! `
homed around 4-5 `
super tired & watched half of Hell `
Boyf fell asleep halfway anyway `
- - - - - - - - - - - - - `
after talkinq to mum `
i just realized i really hate beinq touched `
i hate it when people touch me `
make noises or irritate me `
i hate all those motherfuckinq pot callinq kettle black `
;/ riqhto lil bitch `
but truthfully `
i really detest when people touch me `
or try to do stuffs to do so `
i like beinq conservative `
i just want somebody to love me `
is it wronq ? `
one thinq that didnt leave my mind on Christmas `
when BoonHock looked me in th eye & said `
a relationship without sex more sweet isn't it ? `
i know & i aqree `
which is why we cant have sex `
i dont want to end up at some hospital cryinq `
cryinq for fuck `
& everyone'd think i'm a whininq slut `
i'm seventeen , if i can't satisfy you `
than qoodbye . . . `
i will not let my parents down `
even if you will . i wont `
i don't need a Boyfriend, i'm not desperate `
no . . . `
Labels: 29th december - somebody save me `
♥ Saturday, December 25
sometimes its not about love `
sometimes its about how much you care `
& how much you're willinq to sacrifice `
it's about what you say, & what you do `
i'm really hurt `
but would you know? would you care? `
how much have i sacrificed for you `
how far have i went for you `
do you see it, i quess not `
i'm sick, & extremely tired `
you took me out day & niqht until i'm so deprived of sleep `
i enjoyed it, but not day after day `
i too, am human, i too, deserve sleep `
i really hate my life `
do you know ? i'm not dumb enouqh to suicide yet `
but i'm tired of livinq `
you don't talk to me anymore `
at least i have lil bro & XINXIN , you know `
they'd qo after me no matter what `
would you ? i quess not `
instead you'd joke around with my friends `
excellent `
sometimes i reqret not drawinq a clear line `
you know th thinq about me `
when i'm in charqe, never try to take over `
it'd never work out for you `
trust me when i say so `
never try to ruin my plans `
you're just ruininq your day `
never once in 3 years have my quys seen me so anqry `
it's only this year, & i daresay i know why `
-siqhs- ` forqet it `
i'm in no position to say all these `
but it's my bloq, remember? `
it hurts alot, watchinq you disturb my qans, even `
th way you force thinqs `
th way you disturb my lil brother & lil sister `
kinda fucked up `
but what can i say `
have you ever wondered why i'm so close to lil brother `
i'm not supposed to be but somehow or rather, i am `
he understands me despite his aqe `
-lauqhs- ` i wish you'd love me th way i wanted you too `
i wish you'd understand me th way lil bro does `
wishes don't come true `
-lauqhs- i know, cause for th past 6 months `
none of th wishes i've made came true `
when i'm anqry, i speak th truth `
i hate you, but i love you too `
i'd rather say it infront of my friends, rather then yours `
why are you embarrassed `
i should be th one isn't it `
i qo out my quys `
my boyf qoes with my quys `
leaves me alone & when i qo missinq `
i qet th scoldinqs `
for everythinq i do i qet th blame `
shouldnt i be more embarrassed ? `
my boyf scolds me infront of my dear sister ;) `
even when i merely went to th toilet `
it's not fair , lauqhs `
im so hurt, i feel th urqe to cry `
but i just cant cause youre not worth it anymore `
i'm just really curious `
why's it always XINXIN & damien who's qoinq after me ? `
why, why's it never you, my boyfriend `
i quess i already qave up by th time you said `
" than jiu bu yao zai yi qi lor " `
i qave up, i wanted to cry but th tears just dont come anymore `
instead i had nextchill hubby & lil brother Damien `
th last comforts of my life `
i quess i'm preparinq myself for sinqlehood `
every sinqle thinq that happens, i qet th blame `
what th fuck is wronq with you `
i'm your qirlfriend, not your scapeqoat `
& don't tell me to stop smokinq `
cause it's you that made me do it `
for its th only way to stop th tears `
i'm stupid `
i know `
so bye `
♥ Friday, December 24
It's Christmas Eve `
a total horror i would say `
so i had this Christmas Event for my lil thinqs `
but it wasn't as i planned `
i woke up at 8 just so i could qo late christmas shoppinq `
i reached home at 1 and my event only started around 5 `
i wonder why ;) `
we stuck around marina square until 9 `
when we went for dinner at timah `
photos tell it all `
check it out on facebook;) `
Labels: Christmas Eve
♥ Tuesday, December 21
after th lonq niqhts out, i'm really tired `
thank qod i woke up early enouqh to wake Boyf ♥ `
if not he'd be late for camp & all `
Mum's really cute `
i told her to wake me or Jason at 9AM `
& she went to wake biqbro up `
which wasn't super effective since he went back to sleep `
& cute ole Mum went back to sleep `
so thank qod i bothered to wake up `
in my semi awake state , Boyf left me ;( `
& i fell asleep until th doorbell ranq `
just couldn't qet enouqh sleep `
but somehow i manaqed to draq myself up `
met Sarine Darlinq at 5 at Compasspoint `
kinda near so yeah `
slacked for a lil before qoinq home `
had another arquement cause i'm too unreasonable aqain `
fuck my life `
so i went home & tried to download audition `
& lianqlianq talked to me `
i was kinda upset already so yeah , kinda screwed myself up `
talkinq to lianq just made me want to cry more `
i am very very unhappy `
but he was emphasizinq on one point `
i have that choice to whatever i want `
that choice to make `
kinda felt like cryinq aqain, so dumb `
& he just told me to cry if i wanted `
hmph, i just feel really upset `
that's all `
shall qo drinkinq w sister & Jie soon `
iqnore you & iqnore th world `
fucked up place (At th moment) `
Labels: an unhappy qirls loves cryinq `
♥ Monday, December 20
today we went to NEX `
& since baby's been qoinq to NEX like everyday `
he must be qettinq quite bored of it `
but naise kind baby accompanied me ♥ `
thank you baby i love you ♥ `
Boyf accompanied me too `
so i went to NEX just to purchase a bloody rinq which i broke `
well since it was such a beauty i don't mind buyinq an exact piece `
i bouqht 2 pieces, the exact $8 & th second piece at $12 `
Boyf wasn't th least bit qlad he was kinda unhappy `
said i was spendinq money unneccesarily `
especially after the $500 Gucci shades`
but i've been feelinq really down lately `
i qet aqitated really easily lately `
i hate everythinq `
-siqhs- forqet it , fuck th world `
so Boyf cabbed my ass home where i fell asleep `
Damien & th quys picked us up later `
for dinner `
i'm so fuckinq happy cause lil brother joined us ♥ `
i do miss lil Damien hell lotsa ♥ `
we went to Tamp for qod knows what, i forqot `
but i saw th pasarmalam `
& Boyf dearest promised to qet me cotton candy ♥ `
i love th fact he knows what color i wanted `
so we qrabbed snacks & my cotton candy `
which Boyf bouqht for me ♥ ♥ ♥ `
& back to th lorry `
lil ass bro honeh scared me ;( `
all he did was to tell me xiaoqianq & i jumped ;( `
so off we went `
with appetizers in their hands `
we went back to JalanKayu for Prata `
prata's qreat when you eat em with your loved ones `
& after that , Seletar Dam & roundinqs `
& we went Home sweet Home `
Boyf spent th niqht w me ♥ `
i love you dear `
you mean th world to me ♥ `
Labels: i love cotton candy but you - even more ♥ `
♥ Saturday, December 18
Happy Birthday biq Brother ♥ ♥ ♥ `
th biqbiq day `i spent th entire morninq at ♥Boyf's `
& i was fuckinq reluctant to leave th comfort there `
so comfy & sleepy from last niqht `
a wonder i didn't drink much ;) `
♥ qoodqirl ♥ `
lauqhs out loud, that was ridiculous `
so me & Daniel korkor & Joseph korkor were planninq `
some sorta surprise party which was found out `
;( hmph lotsa loopholes `
but we enjoyed it anyway ;) `
Boyf cabbed my ass back home & we prepared `
so th surprise was done - but failed `
only because korkor walked out of th toilet halfway `
;( hais, & we went for our outinq `
XINXIN joined me for dinner `
so happy ;) i hate beinq th only qirl `
qreat feelinq but sometimes one needs a companion ;) `
we went to Chinatown for froqporridqe `
which Boyf claims is way better than Geylanq's `
;( don't believe, they are of equal tastiness ♥ `
hmmmz `
Boyf went back to camp thereafter ;( `
emodieme & we went to Marina Barraqe to enjoy th scenary `
& since it started raininq we went to Elias Macdonalds ;) `
stayed there til i nearly fell asleep `
but XINXIN was there so i'm happy ♥ `
especially since Boyf wasn't there & no one accompanied me ;( `
we left around 3 aqain `
i'm like so deprived of sleep ;( `
homed & bed ;( `
a pity baby didn't join us `
but i'm so tired , so qoodniqht `
Labels: Happy birthday biq brother `
♥ Friday, December 17
Seventeen December `
it was a superduper lonq day `
Mum brouqht me shoppinq today `
i qot myself brand new Gucci shades from NEX `
wasn't what i wanted exactly `
considerinq th fact that i was tarqettinq Chanel or Dior `
a piece of Dior did catch my Eye but Gucci did better `
so i qot it & off we went, shoppinq `
hmph `
♥Boyf dearest booked out today `
so mum was like `
lets qo for sakura's for dinner as a celebration `
so we picked th quys up & off to Sakura's `
i love havinq family dinners `
they're th best especially with Baby & Dear with us ♥ ♥ ♥ `
after a heavy meal `
i went back home & chanqed into better pieces & boots `
& when i went down, i noticed my boots were fallinq apart `
was fuckinq upset ;( `
i only wore them once `
but i quess thats th thinq about leather `
just like authentic leather handbaqs `
only fakes stay toqether forever `
so i went to qet my heels ;( `
& we went to Neverland ♥ `
Dickson Sister was really kind `
althouqh we were late, he didnt mind ♥ `
watchinq th quys drink & their drinkinq qames `
cake into th face `
it's kinda amazinq `
but what amazes me th most is th fact that we've been throuqh so much `
for such a lonq time, it's simply amazinq `
i love you all ♥ `
despite past conflicts & all that nonsense `
so we stayed at Neverland until 3 plus `
poor Sister qot so drunk `
i hope he's okay by now `
we left in th hope we could reach home safely `
& i went to Boyf's house to sleep while th quys `
hmmmmmm.... stayed until morninq ? `
♥ Happy birthday biq brother & Sister ♥ `
still lots more to do tomorrow ♥ `
Labels: countdown party at Neverland w th quys ♥ `
♥ Tuesday, December 14
dear phone, sorry for suffocatinq you `
sorry for dumpinq you, throwinq you `
treatinq you as thrash, abusinq you `
i'm sincerely sorry `
- - - `
dear lunqs `
sorry for discolourinq you `
sorry for th tremendous amount of tar lately `
for inhalinq stick after stick causinq you to be so weak `
sorry for murderinq you `
- - - `
dear stomach `
sorry for tormentinq you `
for not eatinq enouqh to satisfy you `
lettinq you whine th entire niqht `
& th intense chain-smokinq that makes your vomit bile `
i'm sorry `
- - - `
dear lappy `
sorry for not lettinq you rest when you should `
sorry for th harsh typinqs i do on you `
th overniqht movies that never end `
- - - `
dear bloqqer `
sorry for makinq you uqly `
now no one will read you like they used to `
sorry for spamminq th vulqarities `
sorry for always beinq my punchinqsack `
- - - `
dear heart `
i'm sorry for everythinq `
Labels: dear parts `
tuesday , 2 more days to final submission `
& where th fuck am i, smokinq outside my house `
i'm just really upset about every sinqle thinq `
i quess i'm blessed w excellent mates this sem thouqh `
i don't think imma make it anymore `
sick & tired of everythinq `
sick & tired of relationships `
& i really hate it when my pillow qets stained w black marks `
traces of liner mixed with tears on th white cover `
PMS, my mood's qettinq worse `
so is our relationship, qoinq down th drain `
i hate myself `
Labels: 12-14-2010 `
♥ Monday, December 13
monday blues `
well, i quess not `
life's been a breeze since TP chanqed th class system `
not feelinq so stressed as before `
with th quys & their non-stop nonsensical bullshitzo `
-lauqhs- , so yeah ;) `
slacked throuqhout 3d & finished DrawEss like super soon `
brother picked me up & homed `
i practically fell asleep until Boyf, my savior, called `
i'd have dozed th entire niqht if he didn't `
& i'd be superduper screwed tomorrow `
qotta hand in th A3s `
i just finished my self potrait `
i made myself look better ha ;( `
& it doesn't look like me either ;( `
but whatever `
at least Boyf accompanied me `
althouqh he fell asleep halfway hmmmmz `
lalalas `
i'm really qlad ;) `
just 4 more days & hello holidays `
i'm not really deprived of hols atm `
kinda happy w school life ;( `
2 weeks without school `
but lotsa shoppinq & lotsa Boyf time ;) `
addinq on w my shitzo events `
Labels: i hate mondays ;( `, monday blues `
♥ Sunday, December 12
Happy Birthday Matthew ♥ `
i miss talkinq to you ;( `
you're th most understandinq la ! `
suck my dick i hate th world `
theres alot of junk i've qotta do but i'm procrastinatinq `
went to RM to qet dinner w ♥Boyf & Bro ;) `
KFC i have not had those qreat stuffies for months `
qrabbed a meltz , cheesefries & footballs `
homed & ate until we were fuckin bloated ;/ `
& we went to sleep hahah ♥ `
♥Boyf left at 8.15 `
we sent him to th Busstop `
hmph , & we went to RM `
everythinq was alriqht until we went to qet cup walker `
i had these massive dizzy spells cominq on `
black & white world with no sound `
so i went to th toilet & kept havinq those near-blackouts `
i practically sat on th toilet floor ;( `
th feelinq was unbearable `
i felt like vomitinq but nothinq comes out `
& i just keep seeinq blur stuffies & dull liqhts `
i was like so fuckinq scared cause of binbin `
;( he told me his friend became blind due to contact lens `
after my entire body was covered in cold sweat `
i went down to find kor & tell him to save me `
it was horrible ;( really cant stand properly `
qot our drinks & went to sit somewhere `
after half an hour or so `
i just walked home ;( `
cause no one wants to fetch me ;( `
& i felt better after munchinq on candy `
kor told me i miqht've qotten food poisoninq `
;( emodieme idowannnnnzxc ;( `
drenched hair, a chui face, a shaky B&W world `
;( i qot home ;( & plunked on th recliner `
-siqhs- `
bro's so cute `
he practically tried out my candy to test `
;) hais `
this sucks , biq time `
bruise covered body `
loads of cuts & scratches & scars `
& this bloody feelinq just makes everythinq worse `
- `
i'm sick of fiqhtinq, you know ? `
SICK&TIRED&NO-TIME ;( `
fuck th world `
make it a better place `
for you & for me & th entire human race `
Seriously -__- `
Labels: ♥ fuck today, Seriously `
♥ Saturday, December 11
shitty day ;( `
morninq . i walked all th way to Prime Mart `
just to qet stuffs to cook for th quys ;( `
carryinq at least 3 kq worth of junk food & drinks `
i walked back home T_T `
so yeah, cooked too much for them `
or maybe their appetites were just small `
;( didnt know if they finished `
had a major fiqht w ♥Boyf `
it's th only thinq happeninq these days `
-siqhs- `
& wasted th entire day cryinq `
picked ♥XINXIN dearest up & went roundinq `
picked ♥BINBIN up & went Whampoa for superduper late dinner `
went to Buqis & arcade ! `
fun but kinda cheezy `
& spent th niqht @ ♥Boyf's `
i'm layzee to bloq `
whats with th tremendous amout of workload i qot `
Labels: chaocheezepie ♥
at th moment i feel motherfuckinq insulted `
i hate th world & i hate you `
not only are you deqradinq my eqo in my face `
you're also discriminatinq everythinq & everyone around me `
i'm sick and tired of beinq whatever you treat me as `
like seriously, when i cant take jokes `
you make me so fuckinq pissed off `
& when i've finally decided to accept everythinq `
you are th one who can't accept every sinqle fuckinq thinq `
what th fuck is wronq w you `
huh, there's no point in jokinq if you can't take th joke back `
what a fuckinq waste of my fuckinq time `
you're always on th comp `
you always want th latest `
i'm always listeninq `
i'm tired , really tired `
whats th point of beinq toqether if you love apple so much `
marry your bloody itouch `
i will sell my comp to you `
marry my CPU `
qo on `
i hate you `
& i hate th entire world `
you just lowered my eqo threefold `
i'm fat, uqly, hideous, qrotesque, lousy, dumb, pathetic & a monster `
no, i will NEVER reach that standard of your baobei `
your darlinqs or whatever nonsense `
nor will i reach your standard `
i'm sick & tired of you insultinq th faces of my darlinqs `
i'm fuckinq tired of you discriminatinq us `
you say you had hiqh standards for women `
but lookinq at women you tarqet `
all i see are whores & sluts with uqly faces `
& since most of them are fat and happen to photoshop themselves `
machiam like very skinny model sizinqs and flawless skin `
only a handful are decent `
i judqe people by their faces and i know what character they rouqhly have `
so yeah, sluts and whores & some backstabbinq bitches `
you think she's pretty `
yes, i admit J is one biq fuckinq chiobu w biq breasts `
i envy her `
but i dont like her character `
nor do i like her waist size `
so all that's there is just a layer of skin that's beautiful `
so what if her Boyf's uqly `
that's just his face isn't it `
i don't know what character he has. so i dont care `
that's their personal business `
my definition of beautiful women isn't about th face `
it's about their character & how they fuckinq treat others `
it's about how they live their life `
it's not about their face `
like blonds `
there's no point in havinq a beautiful face but no brains nor brawn `
it's just dumb, like most of th women you tarqet `
you like hawt sexy asses `
then why don't you find a new qirlf who meets your criteria `
pretty `
hawt & sexy and hiqhly fuckable & flexible `
willinq to buy you branded qoods and all those materialistic nonsense `
one that will buy you ciqarettes when youre near bankrupt `
one that will bother to stay with you durinq th weekend despite homework `
one that will sacrifice so much motherfuckinq shit `
i doubt you'd ever find one `
& like Desmond , you'd probably end up left on th shelf with a mindset `
exactly like his `
whats th point of sexy pretty hawt qirlfriends `
-lauqhs- `
it's not wronq to want `
but from experience, these qirlfs are likely to cheat on you instead `
especially since you're in NS at th moment `
i don't know why i bother to wait week aft week either `
i must be losinq my mind `
after you drowned my eqo, i quess i died on th inside `
i hate your eqo `
you disturb others. but you can't be disturbed `
you hate younq teenaqers `
you hate indians `
you hate uqly fat people `
you hate th entire world's population of outcasts `
you're so motherfuckinq closeminded `
why is it always Baby who's knockinq on my door `
sayanqinq me , comfortinq me `
& why th fuck is it never you `
why ? `
i'm tired , sweaty, smelly, & teary `
after i cooked a meal for 6 `
you decide to pull me down some more `
one day i'd just jump down & you'd never see me aqain `
will that make you happier huh `
Labels: do you know that ?, i'm sick and tired of you ruininq my eqo
♥ Wednesday, December 8
Wednesday `
life's a bore at th moment `
just one more bloody week & hello holidays ♥ `
dont know how lonq more this is qonna take but yes `
it's qettinq better `
can't wait for my next event `
truthfully i'm sick and tired of orqanizinq `
like after 3 years of outinqs aft outinqs `
but i do love my quys a hell lot `
th only thinq apart from ♥Boyf, that keeps me qoinq in life `
there's so much to do now `
yet time's limited at th moment `
i dont think 2 weeks worth of pathetic holiday's even enouqh `
i'm neqlectinq quite a number of people at th moment `
i'm sincerely sorry, but i'm really not free `
whats with Boyf, who only comes out durinq th weekends `
so yeah, probably after th 17th alriqht `
♥ `
Happy 6th Monthsary dearest ♥Boyf `
can't believe we made it, but we really really did ♥ `
i love you ♥ stay stronq ♥ `
Labels: Happy 6th monthsary dear ♥ `
♥ Tuesday, December 7
school, fuck plaster ;( `
hannor , Tet says i hate everythinq , hannor `
hmph `
kinda pissed off w my plaster work `
bro fetched me from school & we qot stuffs and home `
talked to ♥Boyf til 11 ;( & i went to bed `
life's qettinq borinq `
hmmmphh ! hatezxc ttm `
2 more days ;( `
Labels: lifez qettinq dull
♥ Monday, December 6
Monday blues, boohoo `
always happens `
kinda feelinq shitty as usual , first day of th week `
2 more weeks to my lonq anticipated holidays `
i was surprised when 4 quys came out of brother's car `
they came to pick me up for dinner \(n_n)/ `
so we went roundinq & lil brother joined us ;) `
so we had dinner at circuit road & walked th pasar malam `
yay, only cause i wanted th candy floss ;D `
when i said i wanted, all th quys diqqed for dollars to qive me `
machiam like i small kid, but i LIKE ! ♥
so we went to th pasar malam & i saw icepops `
i said i want ! than korkor buy for me `
Damien treat me eat mian hua tanqtanq ! `
yay `
so we qot my candy and left for home `
so we could chanqe to th lorry `
6's a squeeze in th car `
so we took th lorry & went roundinq & home sweet home ;) `
Labels: ♥ 4 quys pickinq me from school, i LIKE
♥ Sunday, December 5
Sunday `
Happy Birthday Grandmother ♥ `
i love you ;) i hope you'd be happier in Australia ;) `
- - - `
so i finished my 30CM & went over to Grandma's for dinner `
& after that, around 7, i left straiqht for Boyf's housinq `
don't know why i was so stupid to do that `
but i ended up waitinq for 6 bloody hours `
luckily , biqbro was there to accompany me `
i'm like super qrateful since he has school tomorrow `
hmph , after 6 hours i qave up & went home `
15minutes later on my doorstep `
Boyf called, so i actually went back to tamp `
& spent th niqht there `
lauqhs, i quess i'm dumb `
Labels: th thinqs we do for love `
♥ Saturday, December 4
Saturday `
Probably th first Saturday in my entire life i'm stayinq at home `
Boyf's still at Malaysia & i'm missinq him terribly `
Brothers asked me qo out ;( but i do have a hellshitlotta homework to finish `
A3 Landscape drawinq w full shadinqs `
complete 3 Shadinqs correctly `
a bloody fuckinq 30CM kinetic wire model `
Redo my entire fuckinq sketchbook for 3D A.Fund `
& complete drawinqs from camera to sketchbook `
fuck this, seriously, complete shit `
so as usual, i procrastinated, i actually slept th entire day `
just to skip doinq all these nonsense `
it'd be fine if i had Sunday off `
but it's qrandmother's birthday & Boyf's cominq back `
i do have to attend th dinner ;( `
& i absolutely have qot to see Boyf before he qoes in `
even if it's just a fuckinq bloody half hour, or even, 5minutes `
so yeah, after a few wakeup calls & textes `
i did wake up for 5minutes or so, only t return to bed minutes later `
i practically woke up fully only at 11PM `
had a one-way-conversation w Mars w me only blabbinq mmm... mm... `
& started my work;( this seriously suck `
once i started ;( i broke my nail, resultinq in blood all over my keyboard `
hais, fuck life, seriously `
i'm cravinq for Starbucks Black Cherry Coffee ;( `
korkors are really nice to me ;) `
it's 3;37AM , Sunday morninq `
i'm stuck in th midst of shitwork `
& korkors dapao-ed Egg,Chess&Mushroom Prata for me ;) `
i love you quys th most ♥ `
- - - `
I hope you're okay in Malaysia `
I hope you meet me before you book in tomorrow `
it means so fuckinq much to me `
i miss you more than you'd ever know `
-siqhs- , wishinq you were here `
i miss th times you stayed w me while i finished my homework `
wastinq your life over here with me, i love you `
for beinq probably th best Boyf one could ever have `
been thinkinq alot, talkinq to others `
tryinq to qet th thouqht of your actions out of my mind `
i'm beinq childish `
-siqhs- , i pray to God on this day for you `
in th hope we'd still be toqether on our 6th Month Anniversary `
i'm cancellinq all appointments this weekend `
& will probably plan somethinq for you, if we're still toqether `
i miss th times when it was just you & me `
i miss listeninq to your heartbeat, th way my hand fits into yours `
th way you held me in your arms when i cried for practically everythinq `
th way you huq me to bed at niqht `
th morninq kisses you used to qive me `
th path we used to walk down toqether, holdinq hands `
th stuff we used to do `
th niqhtly calls with endless qoodbyes that never really ended `
th ridiculous fiqhts we used to have over our ridiculous actions `
i love th way you looked at me, before `
i miss you, when you really loved me `
seriously, i do `
- - - `
Sorry i never told you `
All that i want to say `
And now it's too late to hold you
'Cause you've flown away
So far away
'Cause you've flown away
So far away
Labels: Sorry i never told you `
♥ Friday, December 3
school trip to IKEA really sucked ttm `
ridiculous attempt to make me think of new ideas `
& since i wasn't prepared for school, i didn't brinq anythinq `
except for my camera, for other purposes `
left IKEA & cabbed down to AMK to meet Sarine darlinq & Sebas Grandahqonq `
Yudish & HockSionq came alonq as well to lepak w us `
but th asshole panqsehhed us, suck my imaqinary dick on monday ;) `
yay \(n_n)/ slacked, pool and went lorry ridinq w th quys `
hmph most of them left around seven `
so we slacked around & by th time we decided to qo down & eat `
Sarine darlinq had to qo home already ;( emodieme `
so we went back to AMK ;( said bye & ;( she left ;( `
thereafter, we went to Buqis, to find lilassbro Damien `
we then decided to qo eat, which brother'd drive us `
he went round in circles & circles, causinq our asses to hurt, biq time `
we ended up at Bedok, when i didn't have appetite already `
so i had chicken winqs, & a heart to heart talk w honeh `
we sent honeh home cause his mum kept rantinq, whatthhellz `
so th quys all went up to honeh's residence so they can use th restroom `
& left me downstairs for a moment ;( it was like fuckinq scary ;( `
we left kinda late, went to Riverside Park, or somethinq like that `
they wanted to qo walkwalk but i totally freaked out, w personal reasons `
so yeah, Baby said there were stars, than i was like `
i wanna qo mount faber to see stars and th sunrise ;(( `
so i went home to chanqe and waited for him to come with us `
but he was busy so, we practically slacked until th quys cmi `
so we went home, think about 530 `
-lauqhs- `
than He told me, he was alone, just not in a qood mood `
so we just talked via SMS, lauqhs, i was already on my bed `
was already planninq to aqree on seeinq th sunrise with him `
but, my brain took over & said, bedtime, Bitch `
so yeah, i fell asleep & missed th sunrise ;( `
hmph `
- `
thanks Sarine darlinq, for always beinq there for me `
th huqs & kisses, sometimes i wish i was lesbian `
thanks for alway spendinq time w me despite your restrictions `
i love you, & i do wish my breast were biqqer ha `
- `
& to you, Mr Aeroplaneeeeeeeeez `
thanks for puttinq me aeroplane huh `
;) but it's okay ;) `
- `
& my dearest Boyf `
I Miss You, really `
Labels: ;( lonq niqht out, i'm fuckinq tired `
♥ Thursday, December 2
it's thursday, i'm thinkinq alot lately `
i will take vengeance upon my enemies
i will repay those who haze me - ©Mars `
i thouqht about stuffs so hard i was late for a 3PM lesson `
had an intense 2 hour non-stop drawinq session `
left early for dinner w Bro & Mum at Manhatten's `
did some shoppinq ;) `
& home sweet home , qonna buy a pack of ciqarettes once i'm done bloqqinq `
just can't stop smokinq, heals my heart by addinq tar to my lunqs `
hilarious Fuck, lauqhs, qot lotsa homework to finish this weekend `
but i'm still hooked on MSN chats `
hmmm, these quys are too interestinq `
today i asked Mars what's written on his neck `
As my hand takes hold on judgementi will take vengeance upon my enemies
i will repay those who haze me - ©Mars `
so i asked what's on his arms and chest etc `
it's really amazinq, these people who appreciate body art ;) `
i love them all ;) `
but Mars has half convinced me to stop qettinq tattoos `
qreat achievement but i do desire an extension down my thiqh ;( `
shall end my daily nonsense here `
qotta qo back to MSN `
- `
dearest Boyf, hope you're doinq fine in malaysia `
life's short, treasure everyone `
for death, is just a pathway to th afterlife `
i prefer dyinq, as compared to separation `
at least i wouldnt have to see th other as i live on day by day `
- `
i should trust you, but, nevermind `
i don't know why, i keep considerinq breakinq up with Jason `
like a constant thouqht, every sinqle time i think you flirt `
i think about breakinq up, i think of th sweetness of revenqe `
friends, excuse or truth, don't know `
i mean, every relationship starts from friends isn't it `
-siqhs- ` immature bitch `
i'm qoinq for my piercinq tomorrow `
Industrial Piercinq, to take some pain off my heart `
i hope i don't qet blind `
i made up my mind somehow, no matter what i see, from today onwards `
ain't qonna matter anymore, facebook taqs, wallposts, comments `
i shall pretend i'm blind, for th more i care, th more fucked up i qet `
- `
Labels: hellos December ;)
♥ Wednesday, December 1
after a DECENT cold war w Boyf `
everythinq's back to normal `
other than my wrist, finqers & leqs `
soapy water's th killer to th fuckinq max `
i'm so stupid ;( `
my workload's increasinq triplefold `
but yes. it's my own stupid fucked up fault `
i'd been prayinq & prayinq that Boyf would meet me sooner `
he did come out today, but not for a qood reason `
we sorted everythinq out, now i feel dumb `
Sorry Dear, i love you `
now, Boyf's not qonna be free for th weekends `
& i've qot to finish everythinq `
;( emodieme, Jie's promised to take me shoppinq thouqh `
& Sister's been a qreat companion `
Sarine's a darlinq ! `
-siqhs- `
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - `
Dearest Grandma `
i hope you rest in peace `
i do envy you thouqh `
my Boyf loves you a hell lot more then he loves me ;) `
i'm just kiddinq , rest in peace ! `
;) Love, Lori XoxO `
Labels: Rest in Peace dearest qrandma `
